Hey,

I just wrapped up first ever MIL meeting. I had the opportunity to sit down with four brilliant leaders and mull over leadership theory.

It was a great meeting of the minds.

That being said, I have three cautionary tales:

1. Beware of holding leadership meetings next to a black hole that spits out an endless stream of incontinent birds… Let’s just say my leadership journal and someone elses shirt were the targets of a well planned attack from above.

2. Beware of sitting underneath a loud speaker that the restaurant uses to call out orders. Sure, it may play trance-inducing elevator music most of the time. But there are bound to be awkward moments when young male employees try to impress young female customers by smooth talking the phrase “Ashley, your order is ready” …

3. Beware of spilling hot tea on yourself at a leadership meeting… Not just because it’s hot tea, but because a spouse or significant other may think that “leadership meeting” is cover for “wet t-shirt contest.”

Here’s something else I took away from the meeting:

Behold the power of paper boats.

Seriously.

Get this:

One of the things we talked about was the definition of leadership. I pointed out that Tim Sanders, a leadership expert, says “finding the ultimate definition of leadership is to find the holy grail.” Basically, he’s saying the definition of leadership exists, but nobody really knows where it is. There are so many different definitions of leadership that it’s hard to find what is the actual definition.

Here’s what I think: the ultimate definition of leadership already exists. It’s right in Merriam-Webster.

Here it is:

To lead is to guide on a way.

Simple. Let me repeat that.

To lead is to guide on a way.

So where do the paper boats come in?

One of the attendees said that she liked the definition. She said that it was very “zen-like” and reminded her of setting paper boats out to sea.

Japanese Buddhists hold ceremonies where souls are sent to an afterlife aboard small paper boats.

What struck me most about this observation is the use of the word “zen.”

Zen translates into english as “meditation,” and meditation can be defined as the pondering of something: the act of thinking about something carefully, calmly, seriously, and for some time.

That is definately what leadership asks leaders to do: Think carefully about what you influence, and how you influence it.

We become better leaders by thinking deeply about what we’re doing, and observing how our interactions with ourselves, others, and the environment create our reality.

One of the most interesting questions posed at the meeting is what I believed was the biggest problem leaders face. I believe the biggest problem leaders face is the lack of taking responsibility for changing their own circumstances. So many people think to be a leader you must have a title bestowed upon you by an organization or an employer.

That’s not the case.

First and foremost, you are responsible for being the leader of your own life. Beyond that, you have the capacity to influence others and the environment around you.

American business philosopher Jim Rohn said, “The best phrase my mentor ever gave me was … ‘Mr. Rohn, if you will change, everything will change for you.’”

If you make the conscious decision to be a leader, and think deeply about how what you do affects yourself, others, and the world, I’m confident you can improve your life.

Behold the power of paper boats.

One of the greatest myths about leadership is that you have to be given an official title before you can be considered a leader.

This is not the case.

Everyone is a leader in some capacity. The only two ingredients you need for leadership are influence and possibility. You find this leadership in even the most mundane tasks.

For example, when you make breakfast in the morning, you make the choice of what you’re going to eat. Maybe it’s going to be a salad. Maybe it’s rice. Maybe you’re going for apple-cinnamon oatmeal, or a bowl of crispy rice cereal.

Here’s the deal:

There are many different possibilities, but ultimately you choose the possibility, and you influence your environment to make the possibility a reality.

This freedom of choice carries with it a great responsibility. We see this a lot in how we deal with food. And your leadership of your nutrition can manifest itself in how you look and how you feel.

If you eat a lot of fatty foods, and don’t do very much exercise, chances are your metabolism won’t keep up, and you’ll put on the pounds.

On the other hand, if you are careful about what you eat, and add good exercise to your schedule, you can shed the pounds and create a healthier you.

It seems so obvious, so why do people get messed up?

It all comes back to realizing that you are the leader of your nutrition. You are responsible for making the choices of how you will eat.

If you discipline yourself, buckle down, and focus on eating healthy and exercising, you can have that rockin’ body.

The first step in all leadership is taking responsibility, and holding yourself accountable.

We can learn so much from the lesson of the seasons.

In this audio, I share the story of the pear tree that has been passed down for many generations.

May it inspire you to be the leader you know you can be.

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