Barry Scwartz, Psychologist, shares with us the negative aspects of too much choice in this video from TED.

From a leadership perspective, leaders must navigate the risk of choices and shape the way people feel about their choices to lead them where they want to go.

On October 30th, 2010 my cousin Drew Plaugher married the beautiful, caring, and talented Laura Jo Huber. I performed the duties of best man.

As the groomsmen were waiting for the ceremony to start, the officiator, Reverend Terry Brock of The Lima Missionary Baptist Church, told us a story about an experience he had early on in his role as a marriage counseling.

A young man came to him and said, “Reverend. I’m at my wits end. I just can’t take it anymore.”

“Well, what’s the problem?”

“My wife, she’s just driving me crazy.”

“Well, what’s she doing to drive you crazy?”

“Well… when I use the tube of toothpaste, I squeeze it from the bottom up, so that I can use all of the toothpaste.”

“That makes sense,” the reverend said, reassuringly.

“Well, my wife… she just grabs the tube and chokes it from the middle. She wastes so much of the toothpaste that way!”

“I see,” said the reverend.

Of course the toothpaste debacle had caused quite an argument, and had driven a wedge between the two.

“Well, let’s see…” the reverend said, “How much does a tube of toothpaste cost? 59 cents?”

“Yeah…”

“Well, why don’t you just buy two tubes of toothpaste… that way you’ll have one to squeeze from the bottom up, and she’ll have one that she can choke?”

Well, the man laughed at that, realizing how easy the solution was. So, he went off and bought two tubes, and they never had another argument over toothpaste.

The reverend ended his story telling us groomsmen, “If only all life’s problems were that easy to solve.”

I think one of the greatest traits a leader can have is the ability to think win-win. It’s the ability to step back and say, “Okay… What can we do to solve this problem so that everybody wins?”

The more I’ve thought about it, the more I am convinced that it’s not about making others look significant, it’s about making others feel significant through how we treat them.

Two of the most significant people in my life, my cousin Drew Plaugher and my friend Laura Huber, are getting married on October 30th, 2010.

When Drew asked me to be his best man, I said yes without hesitation. I love both Drew and Laura, and I believe in special bond that they have with each other.

As a special tribute to them, I dedicate this video that I made for their wedding.

To Drew and Laura on their special day…

- Jered